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My Favorite Christmas Books & More

Good evening, my Book Dragons. I just got back from a wonderful evening at the Walt Disney Concert Hall. The event was the Salute to Vienna Concert. Brian Cheney, Sera Gosch, and dancers from the San Diego Ballet Company performed. Its not the New Year without the waltz. At the end, Ms Gosch gave the couple next to me her small bouquet of flowers. As they left the stage, the couple then gave me the bouquet as a gift. I was so shocked and so thankful to them. I picked out a rose and gave it back to the couple as a thank you. So gracious. I shook Mr. Cheney’s hand just before left the theater. I told him his serenade from Student Prince was outstanding. It’s one of my favorite musicals that doesn’t have a happy ending. A rare gem.

I did a short video on my favorite books for the Christmas season. I also created an earlier video about Hannukah books. You can view them both here.

What are some of your favorite holiday reads? I’d love to know. Please leave a comment.

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Cosworth Publishing Interview

This is interview was conducted in mid-August 2025. After that, work piled up. It took a very long time to sit down and focus on editing this video. I also have this video saved on the “Be My Guest” tab.

ATTN: ALL TEACHERS, BEHAVIOR TECHS, AND FUTURE INDEPENDENT PUBLISHERS!!! #mentalhealthawareness #autismawareness #dyslexiaawareness #adhdawareness #neurodiversity

A) Do you have student(s) with IEPS for mental health?

B) Are you training to become a teacher, special ed, or registered behavior technician?

C) Have you been diagnosed with a mental health disorder?

D) Considering to become your own indie book publishing company?

If you answered YES to any of these questions, then this video is for you.

Meet the humble heroes behind Cosworth Publishing. A few years ago, I met director Jimmy Huston. He is also a screenwriter and author. I also met his wife, Lynn Mills, at the LA Festival of Books. I bought their Teacher’s Bundle of 5 books. In this interview, both authors share their favorite reads, recommendations, and writing styles. They also share how their company started, the ins and outs as indie publishers, and became autism advocates.

Resources: Cosworth Publishing- https://www.cosworthpublishing.com/index.html Dyslexic Fonts- https://opendyslexic.org/ Shutterstock- https://www.shutterstock.com/ Movie Magic Screenwriter- https://www.write-bros.com/movie-magic-screenwriter.html Guadaulahara Book Festival- https://www.fil.com.mx/ingles/info/info_fil.asp Frankfurt Book Festival- https://www.buchmesse.de/en/exhibit/information-exhibitors/book-fair-year Dr. Temple Grandin- https://www.templegrandin.com/ Actress Chloe Hayden- https://glimmerthreads.com/ OCD- https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/obsessive-compulsive-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20354432 IngramSpark- https://www.ingramspark.com/

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Halloween Haul & Bewitching Books

Hello Book Dragons, and Happy Halloween. I have 2 videos to share. One of my Halloween Haul from various stores & books for October. The second I just made of myself dressed as “Winifred Sanderson” from Hocus Pocus. A little tour of my haven decked out for Halloween. This one is dedicated to my friend Mikey, who wore the costume last year.

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My First Gothic Haul

Hello fellow Book Dragons and Gothic Book Dragons. Are you ready for Halloween? I’ve collecting items for Halloween decor. I’m also a huge fan of Goth daddy Aurelio Voltaire. His unique videos on ‘Gothic Homemaking’ made me realize I too can add some Goth aesthetics. In one video, he explored the Oddities and Curiosities Market. This year, I decided to attend the Oddities Flea Market at the Globe Theater in downtown LA. It was a packed house.

The curator, Ryan Cohn, was just outside the venue and was signing his latest book “The Witch’s Door”. I bought his book, and I told him about my podcast. He expressed interest, and he asked me to email him the details. I did, and hopefully, he’ll be my guest in mid-November. Afterward, I went inside the Globe…the world of Goth turned me upside down! I took a few pictures, and met with the unique artists behind the Goth craze. Some Goth art was more tasteful than others, but they all add their very own style and aesthetics. Beauty is the eye of the beholder. I was genuinely surprised at the beauty of death resurrected in art. I did end up buying a few things, and I truly wish I’d afford more. Enjoy my video below. It airs to the public tonight at 8pm. Learn about the vendors I had the privilege to meet.

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Groovemaster Jerry Jemmott

Hello Groovy Book Dragons and Music Lovers of R&B and Jazz! Here’s my interview with the legendary electric base guitarist Jerry Jemmott . The Groovemaster tells all, including his collaborations with various music industry professionals in his memoir “Make It Happen”. Topics of discussion include self-help books and Buddhism. We also talked about the ‘groove’ and ‘colors’ in music tones. Additionally, subjects covered man’s power to control others, health recovery, and karma. Tune in tomorrow, OCT 30, 2025 @1pm PST.

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Avi Answers Fan Questions! Premieres 9/14 @10am.

One of my subscribers left a comment on YouTube. They asked if I’d reach out to the acclaimed author again. The request was for the author to answer some fan questions from his most devoted readers. The commentator compiled questions asked by Avi fans, and then emailed them to me. I reached out to Avi, and he graciously accepted. Watch for the Premiere of this interview scheduled for 9/14 at 10am on my YouTube Channel.

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Nelson Aspen Talks Titanic’s “Kindred Spirits”: Premieres Tomorrow on YouTube

My interview with the entertainment reporter and journalist premieres tomorrow on YouTube at 5pm PST/8pm EST. Our conversation was very enjoyable. This interview was conducted on June 22. He has his podcast called “Titanic Talks” with cohost Alexandra Boyd. Their followers are Titanic fanatics, or as he so aptly states, “Titaniacs”! Thanks to a mysterious spirit of one of the doomed passengers, Mr. Aspen has spent years investigating the stories and facts of the “ship of dreams”. He finally put to words and created a historical-fantasy novel entitled “Kindred Spirits: A Titanic Tale”. You can check out his books here. http://nelsonaspen.com/books.html

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Visual Storytelling with Briana London: Our Interview Premieres Tomorrow @10am.

I was thrilled to interview Briana London. She is a former episodic editor on Grey’s Anatomy and Queen of the South. She has also worked on other television series and films. I attended the LA Festival of Books in 2023. The first vendor I came to was Cosworth Publishing, Inc. There, I bought books by Jimmy Huston because they went over autism resources. I felt these were important for me starting out as behavior interventionist.

Just as I was about to make my buy, I came across Briana London’s book: “Shanghai Torah”. I finally read it this year. Thanks to Mr. Huston’s help, I reached out to Briana. She was delighted at the chance to be interviewed by me. She discussed her favorite books and recommendations. I was even more thrilled as we went deep into conversations about using common sense in politics and religion. As an editor, I asked her to share her tips and advice for future film/television editors. I also asked her what qualifications are key to making it in the entertainment industry. Afterwards, we discussed her story about the baby Torah’s mysterious journey from Vilna to Shanghai, then to Los Angeles. Who saved it, and how was it brought to China during the Jewish refugee crisis?

Join our conversation Live tomorrow at 10am to find out!

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Interview with Jared Reck Premieres Memorial Day 2025 @10am PST

This interview with Jared Reck was so awe inspiring. We connected on such a great intellectual level, and as educators, we connect even closer to reading and writing. The politics that take over reading, like testing culture, is effecting our readership community, especially students. We discussed essential issues, including how they play out in his recent book release “Donuts & Other Proclamations of Love”. I read this book for the PopSugar Reading Challenge. This story is exemplary enough to become a module for ERWC. This video can also be found under the tab “Becca’s Book TALKS” on the website.

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Cabaret in the Valley Annual Gala Fundraiser Showcase: “Disney Past to Present”

Dear Book Dragons, Music Lovers, and ALL DISNEY FANATICS!

If you happen to be in the neighborhood, come get tickets for our Disney Cabaret. I am a member of my wonderful choir. I’m one of the soloists listed below. Just so you’re aware…it’s gonna get chilly in Act 2. (I’m a soloist for both the Pre-Show and Main Show in Act 2. See details below.)

The San Fernando Valley Master Chorale invites you to our annual gala event,

🎭 Cabaret in the Valley: Disney Past to Present
🗓️ Saturday, June 7, 2025
🕡 6:30 PM
📍 Unitarian Universalist Church of Studio City

Get ready for a musical journey through every era of Disney — from classic favorites to modern hits — in a family-friendly evening of unforgettable performances!

💙 This year’s show features a sneak peek of our group number, “Trashin’ the Camp” from Tarzan, starring the amazing Todd Honeycutt.

🍝 Want the VIP experience? Snag a VIP ticket for:
✅ A delicious Italian dinner of your choice
✅ An exclusive pre-show featuring select soloists
✅ First choice at premiere seating!
(Details on our website!)

🎟️ TICKETS ARE LIMITED — grab yours before we sell out!
Can’t attend in person? No worries — we’re also offering a private livestream ticket you can watch at your convenience on YouTube!

💯 All proceeds go directly to support the Chorale’s mission of bringing high-quality music and opportunity to our San Fernando Valley community.

👉 Get your tickets, livestream access, or make a tax-deductible donation now at www.sfvmc.com
(EIN: 47-2309895 for your full tax refund)

We can’t wait to sing for you!
Warmly,
The San Fernando Valley Master Chorale
🎶 www.sfvmc.com

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Grief, Gratitude, and Family: My Cousin’s Funeral Experience

I also want to provide a personal update, as I’ve been MIA since posting in April. I posted the interview video on May 7, and I just uploaded the blog today about it today. I grieved for my beloved cousin, Daniel, during that time. The Visitation was on May 5. The Funeral was on May 6. Based on my previous blog, he was killed earlier last month prior to the interview.

I went to the Visitation on May 5, and it was a closed casket. The reverend discussed the 5 Mysteries, because he was raised as a Roman Catholic. Then a screen came down. What followed were photographs of him from infant to father. My eyes welled up after seeing some of my close relatives who passed away, including Daniel’s mother, my aunt Elvira. Seeing the picture of mother and son dancing at her 25th wedding anniversary personally broke me. They’re now together in Heaven. The last video shown on the screen was of him recording himself on the phone. He was holding his baby girl in his arms. He talked sweet endearments to her, and it faded to black. I will never hear his live voice again, and I’ve been tearing up as I write this. A few people spoke first about their ‘tio’, cousin, son, brother, and friend. Daniel’s beautiful nieces and I went up and had our say to talk about him. Everyone there couldn’t grasp his sudden loss.

The next day was the funeral at the Holy Angels church in Arcadia. I had no idea he attended there every Sunday at 7:30 am. As the reverend said, “this tall guy with an infinite smile would be sitting right there.” Most of his immediate family sat on the right hand of the church, close to where the choir sang. How profoundly apt that music and choral voices became a part of his life. The Los Angeles Master Chorale were there to sing beautiful hymns. The first song was “Pie Jesu” and a few songs later, “The Prayer”. (This song was made famous by Celine Dion and my favorite singer, Josh Groban.) His brother and longtime girlfriend (and mother to their baby girl) had their say that day at the podium. When we all presided outside to the hearse, we were presented with another surprising miracle. My cousin Ashley, who I call ‘Angel’, is expecting her first child. Her sister is getting married later this autumn. Considering it was a gloomy day, it was a day of grief, gratitude and joy. Afterwards, we all went to the Huntington Library Museum and Gardens for lunch. (They’re usually closed on Tuesdays.) We had lunch in the Rose Hills Garden Court. The large dome overhead was flanked with beautiful florals, and I met some of my late cousin’s acquaintances. I’m grateful to them for sharing their stories with me. I’m looking forward to the day I can go to Massachusetts and make a personal meet up.

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Discover Brooke deRosa: Soprano and Composer Behind Original Operas

Good afternoon, fellow Book Dragons. I’m sorry I’ve been MIA for a while. I posted my latest interview with my friend and composer Brooke deRosa. The interview was shared on “Becca’s Book TALKS” on YouTube. It was posted on May 7. I just published it on the website under the tab “Becca’s Book TALKS”. I’m sharing it here on the blog as well. I met Brooke during the autumn production of “The Mikado.” We both performed with the Ventura County Gilbert and Sullivan Repetoire Company. I performed again in the spring production of “Iolanthe”. Brooke is a quadruple talent as a soprano, composer, conductor and filmmaker. She creates original operatic works from original written works in the public domain. Examples include “The Monkey’s Paw” and her latest work on “The Yellow Wallpaper”. She also created a few film scores, and has been featured on Netflix. As an avid reader, we explore the authors and stories that influenced her life and operatic and musical scores. We also discussed her fascination with the macabre. Her musical influences include “Phantom” and “Indiana Jones”. Check out the interview here or under the tab “Becca’s Book TALKS” on my website: https://youtu.be/zgqeRnc_Gxk?si=yuOMaVkAqDiGyRRa.

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A Devastating Family Loss Before Passover Amid Choir Show Update

My late, beloved cousin, Daniel Aaron Cuevas-Fisch, had attended law school and was an attorney advisor via Social Security Administration, but he grew up playing piano, and he and his family were patrons and great supporters of performing arts. He lived by the motto “joie de’vivre” and he’s synonymous with the term ‘optimism’. He grew up with a sunny disposition, raised Catholic alongside his brother, Steven Anthony, but his mother and father also made sure he celebrated his Jewish heritage, including Passover. Several years ago, he got badly sunburned on his forehead, and lost a patch of hair for a few weeks. His hair grew back on that spot, but it forever remained white (like Mr. Sheffield in “The Nanny”.) It gave him a whole new look and he cut a dashing figure. In his LinkedIn profile, he’s wearing a brilliant blue suit. He lived a full, vibrant life, traveling throughout the world, drank fine wine, and enjoyed every moment with family. 

He planned to continue both the Catholic faith, Jewish traditions and holidays with his new family this year. He and his girlfriend, Stephania, had tried to conceive for several years, and they finally were expecting in late December- early January. Since they love the performing arts, they planned to surround their new arrival with music. We saw they listed 4 childrens’ music story books on their baby registry, and we bought them for new arrival, which they wanted to be surprised themselves. The last time I saw him in person was Christmas. Elke Genevieve Fisch was born January 3rd. I had to remain at home during my uncle’s birthday because I was still sick, and I didn’t want to cause the new baby any illness. He brought Stephania and Elke for everyone to meet her that day. My brother David was especially close with him, and Gabby, my future sister-in-law, was advised by Daniel about law school, and he gave her points to remember. I was working on a personalized baby plaque for Elke, but I had a hard time designing the layout, and I put it off until I knew what to look for. 

Instead, I was painting a Passover ‘palette’ plate (inspired by a Jewish Israeli artist Avi Nadav) last Friday evening, April 11. In the middle of recording the project’s process, I heard commotion coming from the living room. I stopped recording, and ran out to find my parents in complete anguish. They were on the phone with another relative, and shared the shocking and devastating news that Daniel was killed in a car crash in Irwindale just after 4:30pm. I broke down, and thought about how he and Stephania just became first time homeowners and parents, and now to lose him…it’s so difficult to discuss him in the past tense. I just feel so bad for his girlfriend and his baby daughter: he ordered a special dinner they were going to cook for Passover with his family, and instead, they had an empty seat. We were watching some home videos afterwards, and we broke down knowing he’ll never celebrate his first Father’s Day, his upcoming birthday in July, which he would’ve been 43yrs, walk down the aisle, and see his daughter grow up. We were blessed to have him for 42 1/2 yrs, and we’ll continue to support his family in any way we can. 

Yesterday, I informed my choir that I wasn’t sure if I’ll be able to sing with them for our choir show “Campfire to Concert” show on April 27, 2025: https://sfvmc.com/ See information below. (Spring Sale is now thru April 20.) I informed them of what happened, and I asked if we could record the song “Light of a Clear Blue Morning” as a tribute and dedication to him and his family, and I’d create a video for them. After getting much more information, I’ll be performing the final song of the show with my choir.

Daniel’s funeral will be held on May 6. If you’d like to support his family, and for more info on what occurred, please visit: https://www.gofundme.com/f/aid-daniel-stephanias-family-journey

Daniel…we will miss your company. Thank you for 42yrs. I wish you weren’t taken so soon.

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Issue with Contact Page

UPDATE: I made a change to the Contact Page that only lists the email.

Hello fellow Book Dragons. Okay. I just tried to reach out to 2 people who apparently contacted me via the Contact Page with no message. They came through to my regular gmail, and I’m trying to figure out why I’m not receiving any messages in my author email. Also, when I tried to reply, both came back ‘mailed-failed to deliver’. So, I’ll mention the names of those who tried to contact me: Charli Cookson, Eugene Throssell, Roberta Bertram, and WM Burkholder. For everyone else, please do not use the Contact form. Please email me at becca@becca-b.com directly. I will make changes asap.

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ASK DR. WALLS

I was fortunate enough to have connections through Osiris Munir, who introduced me to a few other people. Dr. Kathleen E. Walls was the first interviewee this year, and I was lucky to read her guidebook “Live Your Spirit Life: Vol 1.” She’s also the author of “Froggy-T and Bunnie”, a book series for children that covers all things growing up. She’s an educator, clinical psychologist, life coach, and author with so much to share. You can watch the interview on YouTube here, or under the tab Becca’s Book Talks on this site. She’s also the founder of Ask Dr. Walls: Live Your G.R.E.A.T.E.S.T. Life, and Co-founder of Sisters 4 Harmony, INC. Check out her site here: https://askdrwalls.com/.

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My YouTube Handle Change: BeccaB-TheBookDragon & Other Updates

Hello my Fellow Book Dragons. So, after careful consideration, I decided to change my YouTube handle. It’s now @BeccaB-TheBookDragon, no longer @BeccaB789. All future email correspondence and my signature will be updated to include the new handle.

I also forgot to mention that I interviewed another author and well-renown psychotherapist, Dr. Kathleen Walls, of askdrwalls.com [Ask Dr. Walls | Live Your G.R.E.A.T.E.S.T. Life.] on January 23, 2025. She has written a few books. These include her famous “Froggy-T and Bunnie” series for children. These books cover growth development through learning on various topics. I’m still working on editing, and I’ll have it up in the next day or two. I’ll post it when it’s ready to Premiere.

Lastly, my last junk journal I created last year for my beautiful bff is now posted on my YouTube channel. This was the most filled and decorative journal I’ve ever made. It was a long a process, and I worked on it through Christmas.

The fire threats and evacuations kept delaying the video editing. We never knew if we had to pack up and leave in a hurry. A few people I know lived in Malibu and Pacific Palisades area, and had to evacuate. One of them lost her house in the fire, but she and her family are safe. Her name is Brooke DeRosa, and she’s a renown opera singer and composer. We performed together with the Ventura County Gilbert & Sullivan Repetoire Company in their production of “The Mikado”. DeRosa played Yum-Yum, and I was part of the ensemble. Brooke’s been through a lot since the fire. She lost many of the compositions she was working on at the time. She also had to prepare for her upcoming performance in New York this week at Carnegie Hall. If you’re in New York this week, and have time this Friday, January 31, 2025, consider supporting DeRosa. She’s performing with the Lyric Opera of Orange County ‘Opera with Chamber Orchestra’. It’s her World Premiere of “The Yellow Wallpaper”. I’m working this week. I’m unable to attend. If you can, watch the show. I’d love to hear back in the comments. https://lyricoperaoc.org/shows/the-yellow-wallpaper/

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Help Preserve the Legacy of Holocaust Artist Irving Belfer

I need the public’s help. I’m on a mission to help the Ellis family, whom I’ve known since I was toddler. One of the former patriarchs of the family, Irving Belfer, was a Holocaust survivor. After his liberation, he created several artworks that are museum quality. During his 2nd new life in America, he displayed his artwork throughout his house. He wanted his children and grandchildren to see them. This continued until his death in 2012. Sine then, his artwork was placed in public storage, and the prices are increasing each year. I’ve been reaching out to a few museums myself. I’m trying to see if they’d be willing to reach back to family. Nevertheless, his artwork collection is so huge, the museums can’t permanently hold them. The family is willing at this time that even if a portion of his artwork is taken by a few willing museums, organizations and even private Jewish day schools and/or colleges, it’s a way to preserve his legacy. I’m helping to publicize his artworks, and you can watch my video short here:

(I meant to say patriarch in the video, not patron.) You can watch the short documentary about the artist below. It was filmed by a former student at CSUN.

If you can provide any information, that would be of great help. Please reach out to me directly at becca@becca-b.com. Thank you, and Shalom.

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Health and Reading Goals: 2025 Reading Challenge Update

Good Evening, and a belated Happy New Year to all my voracious Book Dragons! I’m sorry I’ve been MIA, but I’ve been very ill since Thanksgiving, and there’s still no end in sight of what I could possibly have. I can barely talk, and I’ve had some breathing issues due to this continuous cough.

But, at the end of the day, I wanted to create a new video for the new year, and here it is: https://youtu.be/O93rq2sUGWs?si=Yfr-CQXePGhygAiZ My video will premiere on my YouTube channel tonight at 8pm PST. Here, I share the wrap up of the 2024 PopSugar Reading Challenge, the New PopSugar Reading Challenge of 2025, and I get very personal about health, both physically and mentally, and what my goals and resolutions are this year, including taking part in the Conqueror Challenges. Stay Tuned!

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Becca’s Book TALKS with Osiris Munir of Ankh Entertainment airs today at 10am

After almost a year of no interviews, I had a chance meeting with Osiris Munir in my archery class. She is such a gracious person, and holds nothing back. This interviewing was eye-opening for me. Come join me and get ready to learn from entertainment personality to author turned artist.

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Drag is Queen! My Latest Book Review Video Premieres tonight at 5:30pm

Good evening my fellow Book Dragons. I’m sorry I’ve been MIA. I’ve been sick since Thanksgiving, and now I possibly have laryngitis, so I can’t talk. Luckily, before that happened, I did get an interview by chance at the last minute. I’m still editing that video.

For this book review, It took such a long time for me to edit part 2 of “In Praise of Queens” for RuPaul’s memoir “The House of Hidden Meanings”; getting feedback is crucial to the editing as I tend to go off tangents. Mind you, these tangents connect to the video, but it took away from the memoir. It was incredible that I got to see him live at the LA Festival of Books at USC before the protests took over. I didn’t know his birthday was two weeks ago. So, if anyone knows RuPaul personally, please let him know that this is his birthday gift from me. From another view, I highly recommend his memoir because he’s a ‘scholar of the little things” and what it means to be different that transcend beyond the page. He also provides questions for the reader to ponder, and to answer to themselves honestly. Enjoy! Here is the link. I’ll be linking my book reviews to another tab because I’m adding them to my podcast as a separate category.

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Latest Book Review: In Praise of “Queens”

I recorded my latest book review of Xianna Michaels’s stories in verse: “Lily of the Valley”, “the Sorcerer Queen” and RuPaul’s memoir “The House of Hidden Meanings”. Due to extensive amount of time, I divided the video into two parts. Here’s the first one with Xianna Michaels’s stories, where I include anecdotes and reflections about the American dream, and allusions to classic fairytales. Come check it out here: https://youtu.be/CfkSQquJCJs. I will have this posted to another tab in the website as soon as I get some time.

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The History Boys: A Call to Elective Action

I can’t believe it took this long to edit the video, and I didn’t see the ‘date’ of the schedule. However, here’s my critical book review of Alan Bennett’s “The History Boys”, which includes personal anecdotes, and my own POV about the election day. Make your voice heard and Vote! Here’s the video. https://youtu.be/watQWLIqJ24?si=ALb883aLmFkfdY3b

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The Book Dragon Reading Challenge

Hello fellow Book Dragons! Some time ago, I started writing down some new projects I’d like to try to complete, and new ideas. So, since I renamed my YouTube channel, “Becca B. | The Book Dragon”, I decided to plan and write down my own reading challenge book tasks. In a small, leather bound journal I bought an Amazon, I started to handwrite each book task based on dragons, reading, book burning, and challenged/banned books. Usually, most reading challenges, like the one I’ve never completed from PopSugar, have 52 book tasks, with the last 10-12 being “advanced”. 52 books equals 52 weeks in a year, one book per week. However, I came up with 26 book tasks. Half the time, half the books, but no less challenging, with the last two I would consider “advanced”. The real reason for the 26? Students are in school on average for 180 days. Due to excessive amounts of homework, they won’t have much time for extra reading. I wanted these book reading tasks to be fun, but also educational. This challenge is based on my first attempt to get my own former students to read, but also to earn incentives.

A handful of my former high school students accepted the reading challenge questionnaire I created based on the PopSugar Reading Challenge of 2017. I created a dedicated page for each of the 52 book tasks that required students to seek and find the information direct from the books they chose to read. These questions included the copyright information (title, author, publication date), genre, a quote with their commentary, a summary in their own words, and 2-3 additional questions that connected to the different book tasks. For every 5 books read, and 5 questionnaire pages completed (with no sign of plagiarism) prior to the end of the semester/year, the student(s) would earn $25 in gift cards of their choice. I sought out gift cards the school had already for other incentives, but I ended up buying the gift cards using money I earned from my paycheck(s). One student earned $75 for reading 15 books and answered the questions in great detail. After that semester, I became too busy with other professional learning, and so I didn’t do it again.

You may download The Book Dragon Reading Challenge from the newest page added to my website. I do plan to make a reading journal for this challenge, that I eventually want to sell. I’ve seen reading journals in bookstores for people to jot down the books they read that year, and some include questions for the readers to answer. “My Reading Life”, and “Bibliophile” are two of the reading journals I bought for myself.

However, I decided to think outside the box. Why not take it to next level? A real reading challenge every student is worthy of? A TUITION SCHOLARSHIP! That’s the dream that I hope one to turn into a reality for anyone who takes up my reading challenge, and completes the entire reading journal questionnaire whilst they’re still in school. College costs. Students have ample opportunities to earn scholarships to help pay for college tuition, books, room and board. I came across a letter that was sent to me in 2001, entitled “Who’s Who in America”, that acknowledges high school students for their academic prowess and achievements. I wish I would have thoroughly read the fine print: I could have filled out the form, sent it in, and could have earned a scholarship of $1,000 for college, and I didn’t think of it at the time. So, I missed out on a financial opportunity.

Some of the horror stories I’ve seen online include homeless people with both bachelor’s and master’s degrees, some even with a doctorate’. Why are they homeless? Because they couldn’t pay back the student loans, or if they paid back the student loans, they couldn’t keep up with other added expenses, like medical and apartment housing. It’s crazy. While I was working as a teacher, almost half the teachers I worked with were still paying off student loans, and a few were lucky to have partners earning other income so they could live well off until all student depts were paid.

I have a story in mind that will connect to the reading challenge scholarship. Once the story is written and published, the idea is that whoever buys the book, a certain percentage of the proceeds will go towards funding the scholarship. If there’s anyone who knows other legit ways to start a scholarship, I’d love your knowledge and feedback. This is one dream of mine as an educator I would love to actually manifest and to help others. Please let me know what you think by commenting below. If the type from the reading challenge list isn’t legible for you, please let me know and I’ll upload another reader friendly version. Thank you.

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I’M ALL SHOOK UP!!!

I survived the Northridge Quake with my family on 1/17/1994 at 4:31am. It measured between a 6.7-7.2, and it was 30sec of the most aggressive shaking we’ve ever experienced. The screaming, crying, and fear was paramount, followed by countless breaks in between the major aftershocks that followed throughout the day. This disaster was a wake up call, and we made several changes to our lifestyles, but also how we prepared for future disasters. These are simple steps that have a lasting impact, including securing our interior furniture with using both “baby” and “earthquake” proofing materials and tools, and investing in food and drinking supplies that have a long shelf life. We also invested in getting emergency packs and backpacks from “Ready America” site, and earthquake authority companies and affiliates. After going through another few close calls this week in SoCal, including the aggressive “JOLT” felt on August 12, 2024, Japan’s latest 7.1 megaquake, and Yellowstone’s “Old Faithful” geyser erupting twice, I felt I needed to say something.

I recorded and shared my personal story about the Northridge Earthquake, personal commentary on Japan’s devasting earthquake and tsunami on 3/11/2011, my emergency prep supplies, what I’ve learned from other preppers, from the average person to the most extreme “Doomsday” preppers. Check out the video here: https://youtu.be/zAHwH6neSMI?si=4SX1Amgf-bXzyr9D

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I HAVE A ‘STICKY’ SITUATION!!!

I’m really considering changing my website to another platform. I thought my post about the Cabaret was placed at the top of the blog as it always does. This is another extra step that is so not necessary. Such aggravation. If anyone else is having this problem, there’s this thing under “Post Settings”- go to “Status”, and click on it. Settings will appear bottom left, and you need to click on ‘Sticky” so it posts to the top of the blog. Totally unnecessary AND an extra step I don’t need to take! Why can’t website platforms keep things the way they are? The help center bot said that certain themes have designs that allow the newest blog to be posted first thing. So, please forgive me that this post wasn’t posted until now, 3 weeks after the event took place. I will have an update once our performance video is edited, and will be posted on our choir’s website http://www.sfvmc.com. Those who want to watch it can have access to it as a $5 donation fee.

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CABARET ON SUNSET JULY 7, 2024

Hello fellow Book Dragons and music lovers! I’m sorry I haven’t blogged in a while. In the middle of rehearsals and working, I unfortunately came down with a severe pinched nerve that’s affecting everything I do. It’s very painful to sit at a computer and type. However, I did post earlier about my recent harp recital and upcoming cabaret in a video on my channel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9VABcIGfv0. In honor of the July 4th weekend, our Cabaret on Sunset is a Tribute to American Composers at the famous Catalina Jazz Club. I’ll be singing some group pieces, including a duet with one of our Artistic directors, Charlie Kim. Come and support this amazing company of singers this Sunday July 7, 2024 @ 7:30am. Go directly to https://www.sfvmc.com/ for tickets and additional info on dinner and our Program https://www.sfvmc.com/cabaret-on-sunset-program-2024. Getting tickets early guarantees you a table reservation. Tickets may still be available for the VIP seats in the first row (that is if you don’t mind loud music from our band.) Any questions, write to Julie at execdirector@sfvmc.com.

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The Next Loreena McKennitt?

Hello fellow Book Dragons. For those of you just tuning in (literally) I began harp lessons last year after almost 40years. I’ve loved the harp since I was toddler, and I bought a harp on Amazon back in 2017. (This was after I secured a teaching position and an apartment near my school in Victorville, CA at the time. I was promised a $400 Amazon gift card with Frontier (the apartment only used their company) as part of this ultimate package; they did nothing but screw up my account several times, and I spent almost a year screaming my head off and crying on the phone demanding to talk to a manager, what I wanted, what the original price was, and what they owed me in the end. Long story, and too much aggravation for me to indulge in.) On a brighter note, the first harp arrived, and I didn’t see anything wrong at first. I was too elated to finally have this instrument in front of me. That’s when I looked over and saw that the harmonic curve was split in half. (See Pic Below). So, I had to report it to the seller, repackage it, wait for them to pick it up, and they sent me a replacement. The second harp is the one I currently have. There were no harp teachers anywhere in the area except downhill in Pasadena almost an hour away.

Cut to 2023, when I was determined to find a harp teacher after much needed music therapy and the harp lay dormant for almost 6 years, and EUREKA!!! Enter Stephanie Bennett, a local harp teacher. To my surprise, the harp is harder to play than it looks, and with mine, I had to compromise with what I had and was able to play. The harp is a Roosebeck Heather Harp (Lever, not pedal) with 22 strings, C3-C6 range, which makes it 3 octaves. The first song I wanted to learn to play was “Why” from (Tick, Tick, Boom), but I also wanted to sing it simultaneously. (Loreena McKennitt is the only harp songstress I know, and I love her music so much.) Solution: Ms Bennett rewrote the piano score to be one half-step higher since most harps are tuned to Eb, and therefore G and D sharps/flats (included in the original score) can’t be tuned to that key. We tuned it to D major, and then switched it to E major mid-song by pushing 3 levers up.

I auditioned with the song “Why” twice: once last year for our Cabaret in the Valley performance (they chose first song “Nobody’s Side” (Chess)), and once again for this Cabaret on Sunset (Upcoming on JULY 7, 2024- Tickets are available now!) The song was too long, and I’ve yet to practice performing a duet with our Artistic Director Charlie Kim. However, I decided to give it my all, and perform this song for the Harp Recital with Harp Society LA (the Los Angeles Chapter of the American Harp Association). I edited a video together using both recordings both my recital piece in my library room setting, and my parents recorded my Stage performance (using my real name, as I use the same for the choir).

I posted it on YouTube- now here’s the weird thing. I got a ‘copyright claim’ for the first recording, but not the second. So, I went in to dispute it as fair use, and since there’s no combination of cover-recital piece type, I chose “Cover Song”, but I explained in detail that it was not to monetize the channel, no copyright infringement intended, and it was just me showcasing my recital piece. To make sure I was going about this legitimately, I emailed the copyright office and to Universal Music Publishing Group to explain in detail what the video was about, and to ask if there were any steps I needed to take so I wouldn’t get docked or get a copyright strike. I made a second video to upload just in case, omitting my first recording. The Link to the current YouTube video is here: https://youtu.be/qgQXQoD0-8s. I just posted the shorter one with the stage recording only: https://youtu.be/VFowZmcukpw. I believe I found my niche to be a harp-songstress.

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2 Upcoming Performances

Hello my fellow Book Dragons. I want to give a shout out to my new subscribers, and I’ll be sharing the drawings with you as promised. At this time, I also wanted to inform you all that I created a video promo for my two upcoming performances, which you can view here. https://youtu.be/g9VABcIGfv0?si=IkFiz35PHkLiCYnA

As new beginner harpist, my harp teacher informed me of the Spring Student Recital on June 8th 2024 at the First Baptist Church, Pasadena, CA @ 1pm. https://www.harpsocietyla.org/calendar/icalrepeat.detail/2024/06/08/186/-/student-recital-2024

I loved the film version of Tick, Tick, Boom, and Andrew Garfield blew everyone away with his outstanding performance as Jonathan Larson. I had no idea that the late composer created 2 musicals before Rent, and Tick, Tick, Boom was his biographical account of his failed attempts to bring his first musical to life. During that time, Larson was watching his closest friends succumb to the AIDS epidemic. The song “Why” is a ballad, but its also a song of hope (I cry as I write this) of how life should be valued as time is precious. I decided to take up the harp this last year, and spent a few months learning how to play the song (I’m still technically plucking it, with some intermediate level), and so I’m singing and playing my heather harp as accompaniment. (I will be doing a future of why the harp is my favorite instrument.)

I also auditioned with this song the year before, and auditioned again with the harp and vocals for this upcoming Cabaret On Sunset: A Tribute to American Composers with our San Fernando Valley Master Chorale. I was hoping to perform a duet with one of the members and guest artists who I went to high school with as secondary choice. At the last moment, I saw a YouTube clip of two members from the acapella group Pentatonix, Scott & Kristy, perform a duet mash-up of Go the Distance and Defying Gravity that blew me away. Such Powerhouses those two alone! I suggested it to our music director Charlie Kim, and I was waiting for feedback. I was surprised to see that it was selected and not “Why” since I didn’t get a chance to audition with Charlie prior to the program setup. Who knows! Right now, it’s not on the shows program, but who knows! It might if something changes. Our choir show is at the Catalina Bar & Grill Jazz Club, a famous venue in Hollywood, CA at @7:30pm on July 7, 2024. If you’re able to come, the dress code is Hollywood Glam Cocktail, dinner is at 6pm, and there are VIP tickets for the first 30 front row seats. Other Important details follow in the link provided. https://www.sfvmc.com/

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Butterflies Abound + Update

My latest video of my latest junk journal creation was posted on YouTube yesterday. You can view it here. https://youtu.be/YkBFEJu5m1o?si=5jqwcPImSmtgAhfP Please click like, subscribe, comment and share for more videos. I’m hoping to gain more subscribers to help grow my channel.

My review of Audible’s Premiere of 1984 https://youtu.be/wsbpYocmpYc?si=qph3KYbSCDFlhCzN has reached up to 118 views so far, and I’d love to have more people view it. You may share it on social media platforms, but I’m still adamant: do not share it on Facebook. Later in the video, I explain what happened, not too much in detail, but to the person I’ve been trying to reach out to. I got scammed twice, without having the proper direction at the time, and nearly a few more times in believing the person I was messaging, and was trying to determine from other sources for clarification. It’s been now over a year and a half since I first reached out, and there’s been no resolution.

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Dreamscapes- Upcoming Choir Performance

While I continue to read and practice the harp, I’m also a member of the San Fernando Valley Master Chorale. Our next performance is coming up this weekend. If you’re local and in the valley, come out and watch and support us as we take you on a ‘musical journey to the stars.’ Video link is here, and posted online. https://youtu.be/uwihZHlOX_g Enjoy.

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Oops…Video Premier Error

Hello Book Dragons, if you’ve seen the latest change to the original “BookWorm” Blog. It’s now the BookDragon Blog. Also, I didn’t realize the YouTube premier had been set for tomorrow (5/5) at 11am. I made the immediate change to the premier from the last post, and it will premier today at 11:30am. Not the ideal time, but I’m trying to keep up.

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LA Festival of Books 2024

I recently uploaded a video about my trip with one of my girlfriends to the Los Angeles Festival of Books on April 20, 2024. Besides my book haul, I managed to attend two lectures: the Fabulous RuPaul and Contemporary Gothic Fiction Author Panel, which included Alix Harrow. You can view the video here when it makes it’s premier today at 11AM, and take notes. https://youtu.be/EpiAT-l9y3s.

However, due to recent events that have escalated across the campuses, it’s apparent that the future of this campus playing host to this public event is now in question. I decided to wait, and will record a separate video, which will be both an informative piece and a call to action. Stay tuned for updates.

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Updates & Audible Original 1984- My Review

You can watch the video here, but I’m ADAMANT: Do Not Share this post or video on any other social media! I prefer to keep this video off those platforms. See Details below: https://youtu.be/wsbpYocmpYc

Hello everyone. It’s been a while since I wrote. I’ve had some personal issues that have really affected me as of the year before, and haven’t been resolved. It was a traumatic experience that I didn’t intend to happen, and that’s why I decided to seek help. Between televisits (no, not BetterHelp) and physical therapy for my chronic condition, it’s kept me busy. As of late, I now have two part-time positions that are taking up the majority of my time during the week, which is why I’ve had little time for reading, and having to postpone videos for the weekends. I’m trying my best to complete an online writing course, working on my stories, and reaching out to other avid readers and authors to hopefully get my podcast up and running again. When one door closes, another one opens. ‘. I’m trying my best to complete an online writing course, working on my stories, and reaching out to other avid readers and authors to hopefully get my podcast up and running again. When one door closes, another one opens.

That’s what happened as of late. One author was kind enough to reach out to me earlier in January, and had the publicists send me the arc of this recent publication. I was in the middle of reading and was hoping to hear back as this author was abroad and seemed to agree to be interviewed. Suddenly, I was told this author was completely booked throughout the year. I wrote them and the author back to let reiterate what was stated, and I hope to finish the book and be able to interview this author once there’s an availability. Out of the blue (literally), I heard back from another author of many months ago in silence, and we’re looking into a future interview in late July. (fingers crossed). Hearing back from this author in particular made my evening last night. Her first story is one of the best stories next toe Arthur Miller’s “The Crucible”.

On April 4, 2024, the Audible Original of 1984 premiered. This audio drama- I can’t express how incredibly AWESOME this was to listen. I’m not a fan of audio book recordings, but this novel was “dramatized” by Joe Wight, and had the best performers as the main characters- my favorite actor, Andrew Garfield as Winston Smith, (the use of “exaggerrated breath” is his specialty to add emotional trauma); Cynthia Erivo as Julia (like the character “Trinity (The Matrix) she’s very direct and precise); Andrew Scott as O’Brien (like the late actor, Cyril Richard as “Hook”, sinister voice choreography on his part); Tom Hardy as “Big Brother” (Commanding Dictatorial Voice); I was just introduced to this actor-comedian, Romesh Raganathan as Parsons (character appears to be positive, but like Winston, very unsure of his position. Like Carol Burnett in “Friendly Fire”, I didn’t see this coming. A comedian has just as much power to make people laugh, and even more powerful to make people cry.) The music was cowritten by Matt Bellamy and Ilan Eshkeri- this reminds of music by Hans Zimmer- very apocalyptic, epic themed techno-orchestrations that build-up to cliff hangers.

I read this story to my former students, and so after listening to the audio drama, I decided to make a video combining both of them together. I introduce the viewer with a performance “hook” based on a rhyme the character Winston Smith recalled, and sings in this version. Then I go into the story, including how certain story elements relate to other sci-fi stories, like “The Hunger Games” and “Fahrenheit 451”. I then tell a little of my own history growing on the audio read-along stories, and the power of voice actors behind the microphone, both for audio and animated films. I then go briefly over radio drama history before discussing my review of the Audible Original premiere, detailing each actor’s unique theatrical power to their character, and a brief stint on the power of propaganda, a universal tool for empowering division amongst people. As I state in the video, “they pulled out all the stops” and this was “a stellar performance”. I give this 5 stars.

The last part I posted was the hardest for me. I just hope the right person reaches out as I got scammed twice, which caused me emotional trauma.

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Messiah 101- An Educational Choir Concert

Come join me as I sing with my local choir, the San Fernando Valley Master Chorale, to Handel’s Messiah. Our artistic director decided to take an educational and interactive approach with this concert, and we’ve been singing high notes that will reach to the heavens. Here’s my latest promo https://youtu.be/w7HmPlMa8kY and you can also view the choir’s promo here at https://youtu.be/8rqShZYjbaM?si=2AUpDLGELaLADRlv. Tickets available at http://www.sfvmc.com

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New Email Update

Hello to my fellow subscribers. My new email has been updated on the contact page. I need everyone to do a test and write to me at becca@becca-b.com. I’m still trying to configure the emails to subscribers, and I’m trying to make this as simple as possible. Whenever I send update, it’s still using my gmail, and I’m trying to change that. This would be a great help. Thank you.

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PopSugar Reading Challenge 2024

Here is my first video of my books TBR list based on the book prompts of the PopSugar Reading Challenge. Come watch the video on my YouTube Channel because if you’re taking part in this challenge, I have plenty of book recommendations, and titles to share. This also includes about 5min alone of book titles that became musicals. Grab your pen, paper, and get ready to write down with me! Enjoy! https://youtu.be/hpPAUcHDcIc

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The End of 2023 PopSugar Reading Challenge & My Last Book Reviews

Once again, I didn’t finish the reading challenge this year. This video shows which of the last books I read for final tasks I was able to complete. You may watch the video here: https://youtu.be/LYQDSsJpMYE

A lot of personal issues affected my well being and my reading this year. I’m praying that next year, 2024, will be better, and I’m hoping to MANIFEST my wishes and goals. My family and I continue to send thoughts and prayers out to the families of the hostages and the IDF who are fighting to be returned home and end this war, and all those who have been affected.

Thank you to my newest subscriber. I have to catch up on the new subscribers to send you my digital freebies as promised.

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New Podcast Interview To Premiere

Check your times for the 10am YouTube premiere of my interview with author and medieval scholar Dr. Kavita Finn on December 9th. This was a surprise, great honor and privilege for me. We delve into her TOP 10 Books, Medieval studies and boundaries, how the era plays out in GOT, LOTR, and other Arthurian Retellings that have programmed our current society to traditional European-based middle ages when there’s much more. She also discusses the authors who are challenging the traditional stories by “re-storying” and “counter-telling”.

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Book Reviews & Recommendations: Latest Vlog

Just uploaded my latest Vlog for Thursday’s Thru the Page on my YouTube Channel. 2 more books checked off the PopSugar Reading Challenge List, “Letters to a Young Poet” & “The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane”, plus Rabbi Kedar’s “God Whispers”, which delves into divine spiritualism we’re looking for in the midst of chaos. I reflect on life changing books, from favorite films, television, Andrew Garfield, and how certain passages/quotes transcended from the single student to the masses. Enjoy! https://youtu.be/SCtng5-qP6I

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The “Almost” Halloween Baby- Read Aloud

Well, I couldn’t procure a public reading event at my local library nor at my former elementary school. People didn’t get back to me in time, as it takes months to get accepted, and 15 days prior to requested dates for school events. So, this was the best option: Reading my own children’s story aloud to the masses on YouTube, followed up with a Discussion Questions & Answers. Enjoy! Spread the word!

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Barbara Saltzman, the “Jester’s Mom”

Yesterday on my podcast, I had the honor of interviewing Barbara Saltzman, the CEO of “The Jester & Pharley Phund”, aka, the “Jester’s Mom”. Almost 7 years ago, I met her at their booth on April 9, 2016 at UCLA’s Festival of Books. I instantly knew that he and I were meant to be soulmates. She’s the mother of the late David Saltzman, a Yale graduate who passed away in 1990 just before his 23rd birthday after a 2 year battle with Hodgkin’s disease. He came up with the story after he was diagnosed, His legacy was the establishment of his family’s independent publishing company and printing house after they decided to make his children’s story, “The Jester Has Lost His Jingle” a reality. They went through personal sacrifices, emotional and financial difficulties to publish his story and become a non-profit organization, donating thousands of books to hospitals for children fighting cancer. They’ve continued his legacy to the classroom with educational activities and curriculum supplements, and even designed the Jester Doll. In 2 years, they’ll be releasing the 30th Anniversary Edition, and they’re almost out of the Jester Dolls. During our interview, they were some surprising “hidden gems” from author illustrators (ie. Sendak, Schulz, Karle, Dahl, Seurat) and the late composer Stephen Sondheim and “Sunday in the Park with George” who were the inspirations behind David’s story and illustrations. You can read all about David’s life, his story and help with a donation and/or buy the book at their website: https://thejester.org/ to keep David’s children’s story alive and continuing to inspire people to never give up. I’ve embedded the link to the interview on the Becca’s Book TALKS tab, but you can also watch it here on YouTube: https://youtu.be/VnAUf_r2tI0.

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Rainbow Junk Journal Completed!

To all my viewers who love junk journaling, I finally completed the last two videos of the making of the rainbow junk journal for a very close family friend, Samara. Part 8 has multiple clips, at the beginning showing how I struggled to punch in a grommet, and the rest is followed up with the rest of the process- beading ribbons, spraying metallic distressed inks, sealing them with a varnish including going back over the embossing powders, and burning my fingers using the heat gun. You can watch it here using this link: https://youtu.be/lSr0EqiWckU?si=gzJH8V_jdDAXwC5R.

The final video is of the reveal: https://youtu.be/SxcFFVlNIZg?si=622IwYKztsiiHtnS.

Stayed tuned for a new video. Tomorrow is my interview with Barbara Saltzman, the mother of the late David Saltzman, whose legacy of the “The Jester” has lasted over 30 years in the hearts of children fighting cancer. I’ll post it to the Becca’s Book TALKS tab afterwards.

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Seeking Dramaturg

It’s been a little while since I posted, but I wrote a short 2 act play in the month of July entitled “Lessons from Ms. Bell”, which is a “play” within a “play”. An adaptation of J.M. Barrie’s Peter Pan based on the original libretto. I’m seeking a dramaturg to read it, and inform me of the proper steps to 1) make sure I’m adapting it legitimately via licensing; 2) hopefully get it produced; 3) apply for copyright via the Dramatists Guild. I’d like some feedback as to whether or not it should be a one act play, and if there’s more I need to add or omit. I’ve already looked into mentorship called a PIP from the Dramatists Guild Institute of Dramatic Writing, but before I take that step, I’m seeking a local dramaturg at this time. If you know someone who would be willing to read it, please contact me. Thank you.

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Digital Freebies Sent 10-8

To all my current subscribers. I made a contact list to send out the digital freebies to the emails provided in my subscriber list in WordPress. I emailed you all on October 8. However, only one of the emails provided has somehow rejected it, and I have no other way of contacting you. Will “D.Kend” kindly contact me via CONTACT tab about how to properly send you the digital freebies as promised? Thank you.

On a final note, I wish you all to please pray for all individuals affected and caught in the crossfire by recent events, and the safe return of the hostages.

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Important Updates

To all my subscribers, and to potential future subscribers. Please pay attention as I have new important updates on my digital freebies and interviews, especially now with the devastation in the Israel attacks.

  1. The digital Freebies- until I can create an account for a newsletter that will allow me to include freebies form this book, and others, I will be emailing each of you individually in a group a PDF of the freebies so this way you’ll have access to them to print them all. Often in Canva, I clicked “share” instead of print. It’s more complicated than it needs to be.
  2. In lieu of the most recent tragic events unfolding in Israel, as my thought, prayers, heartache and emotions are all over the place, I wrote to Rabbi Kedar to ask if she needed to postpone this interview on October 10th until things settle down. Her director of Congregation BJBE just emailed me that “she has many loved ones in Israel and her focus is entirely there.” I replied to her that it’s totally fine, and we’ll circle back. We’ll reschedule once we have word. Please pray for the safe return of the hostages, and the State of Israel to overcome this tragedy. To one Israel P., you’re in my prayers, and all our family friends who are in Israel at this very moment.
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New Subscribers

OK. I’m very upset that No one put this in black and white when it came with this subscription rules, and to what I could do before. After mich hassle, I read this under the newsletter confirmation.

The ability to customize the confirmation email message had to be disabled to prevent abuse. It will revert to the default message for all new subscribers.

Apparently, this is for all users, which makes absolutely no sense. I couldn’t make a landing page to connect to have the freebies added via Canva, as it nearly messed up my entire site, and I had to have the Happiness Engineers fix it. They then informed me how to add the freebies to the newsletter confirmation.

Has anyone else encountered this problem, and is there free platform where I can send a Newsletter confirmation that will include the digital freebies to new subscribers??? Advice needed.